Tuesday, March 7, 2023

Tesla Techies

For those of you who don't know, I now have a Tesla. Ordered before Elon Musk even made the slightest move to buy Twitter. To be honest, I don't know if that would have made any difference in the end. EVs are like driving computers on wheels. Like one of my sons said, "If Mom can figure it out, then we should have no problems." Or something to that effect. 


Tesla Techies


Taken hostage by the prestige

of working for Tesla.


Given the title of Advisor instead

of Sales Rep prevents smarmy smile

overkill, promises minimal interaction.


My "Advisor," rapidly listing bare

essentials when I take delivery,

concludes with "Any questions?"


I smooth my creased brow trying

to appear confident. Deny ignorance.


He assures me I can find all answers

needed in the Owners Manual.

Onscreen in the vehicle. Online.


He shifts his feet and checks his watch.

Glances over my shoulder. Total time

with me: 15 minutes.


Not tech savvy, I leave the lot slowly,

curse the spitting rain as I fumble looking

for the wiper control - onscreen.


Tesla "Advisors" could learn a lesson

or two from the dissed car salesmen

down the road.


And I don't mean parking the inventory.



Marilyn Aschoff Mellor


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